It’s official, we are a family of four! In this fourth trimester recap, we are exploring all things motherhood from newborn cuddles, transitioning from 1 to 2 and returning to work. Every moment of this new chapter has been a complete blessing we do not want to forget!
Our second daughter joined our family in early March, though it feels like she has been here all along! Each day has brought new memories and has continued to fill our hearts in ways we could not have imagined. Now that the fourth trimester is almost through, we begin our next chapter – back to work and juggling new schedules all over again.
What I am loving
Newborn cuddles – Is there anything better than newborn cuddles? I am talking about the way they curl up on your lap and into the tightest little ball on your shoulder. And the little ‘coo’ noises. Or the rhythm of the way they eat. And the noises while they sleep. I can’t get over it!
Seeing our family interact – The new dimensions to our family have my heart in a bind. My daughters are so cute with each other (the little smiles and hugs / kisses melt my heart). And of course the way my husband holds not only one little girl but two in his arms.
Baby clothes – I put away our newborn clothes within the first 2 weeks of our little one’s birth. My heart was a mixed bag of emotions. I can not believe she is growing so quickly.
Baby wearing – I feel like everyone I have talked to who has a second (plus) child wonders why they did not baby wear more often during their first postpartum period! I am one of those moms. I had a wrap last time and absolutely fell in love with my Solly Baby wrap this time.
Little one is commonly curled up in my wrap. Plus, I can not complain about the hands free time (IE doing dishes, laundry, playing with our toddler, going for walks without a double stroller yet).
Grocery pick up – Once we figured out grocery pick up was free at our local Meijer store after spending $35, we never looked back! Not only has this saved us time, but it has saved us so much money not walking around a store and picking out what sounds good. Budget hack, for sure.
Being the ‘mom I want to be’ – I told myself I wanted to do everything I wished I could do with muy daughters while I have been off from work. We have been spending endless amounts of time together and getting through the good and the tough days.
It took a little bit, but we have been in a steady rhythm of tackling the ‘must do’s’ (laundry, dishes, house chores). And we are also doing the things we ‘desire’ (going to the park, playing games and being creative, extra long walks, baking more food from scratch and watching movies). This has made me realize how much I need to carry this over into the evenings and weekends when I have the most time with our family.
Time to focus on desires (Blog and Money goals) – The fun part about welcoming a new child into the family which causes everything to shake up, is a new focus. Whether this be on goals, habits or overall lifestyle changes. I have been investing time to where my heart feels draw. Of course this is with our daughters and at home. It is also into our future.
We have also talked a lot about our monetary goals, dreams and desires for our family. It has opened lots of new conversations and really helped Spencer and I target the ‘why’ behind doing things (like budgeting and both working full time).
How I am Feeling – Mentally
Having another springtime baby has been one of my favorite parts of this pregnancy! Begin able to get outside with both girls and into the sunshine and warmer weather fills all of our buckets.
Spring feels like the whole world is experiencing a shift. The birds are out, trees and flowers are blooming and lots of babies are being born (I am talking about you, ducks and geese!).
We have been loving going to the park and getting outside on walks each day. This has helped my mental space so much – especially since working out was not on the forefront of my mind (or what my body would feel good doing).
Mentally, I will say I am feeling down about having to leave my little ones for so much time during the work day again. My full time job is demanding and requires I step away from the house at times. Thankfully I do not travel far (and rarely overnight).
I will be the first to admit this is not always where my heart feels drawn, but I know the desires we have for our families future. Thankfully this is not my first time going back to work so I know what to anticipate on some fronts. I will never get over my toddler asking us to ‘stay – don’t leave’.
How I am feeling – Physically
Physically I feel SO much different than the first pregnancy. I am not sure if my body just knew what to anticipate a little more or the fact I had an unmedicated birth and followed the Bradley Method.
I do think another difference was taking the first (almost) two weeks to couch rest. We were lucky enough Spencer had a little bit of time he could take off during the first few weeks so he could help with our first born, make meals and take care of me.
Because of this, I did not go up and down the stairs and stayed put as much as possible. While this was an adjustment for me because I am a ‘go getter’, I leaned into support. I feel like this set us up for success once Spencer was back at work full time.
My plan is to hop into the Mamaste Fit Postpartum ‘Return to Fitness’ course after a few sessions at a Pelvic Floor Physical Therapist. I did the reverse last time – started working out before I went to pelvic floor PT and feel it delayed my fitness journey / healing. Walks have been a life saver during this time to get moving while also paying attention to my energy.
How our family is adjusting
If I can speak for our family, I think we have been adjusting well. Each person seems to have their own adjustment period and are taking things one step at a time.
Spencer has been the super hero dad. He has been the preferred parent most of the time by our first little one. He is working full time (and crushing it) in his new job. Plus he is still working out, maintaining our home and keeping our vehicles in tip-top shape.
And he is balancing supporting me as much as possible! Seeing Spencer become a dad all over again is the best. He is so sweet with our second little one and I catch myself thinking how lucky I am to have a husband and dad to our daughters.
Stella has been adjusting well to our second little one! The first thing she did when she saw her was lick her on the head. I would say that is the ultimate Australian Bernedoodle stamp of approval. With that being said, she is getting just as much attention as before and is a reliable walking partner.
Our first daughter is doing great. She was instantly interested in the baby and wants to help with everything. Her independence has sky rocketed over the past few weeks.
Plus she can verbalize her needs and wants a bit better now that she is 2 YO. This has been very helpful on all ends to make sure we are meeting her needs, too.
She is definitely getting into the groove of the big sister role – accompanied by lots of hugs and kisses to the baby.
Preparation for Back to Work
As we approach the timeline for me to head back to work full time, I have a lot of things to do. I am a big list person in order to feel prepared and accomplished each day. On my upcoming checklist are: meal prep, schedule blog content, breastmilk freezer stash, prep the garden and of course – as many baby / toddler snuggles as possible!
Similar to meal prepping for postpartum, I will be doubling meals over the next few months. I will also be thinking of meals I can make in advance for breakfast and lunch to take on the go. Additionally, I will be preparing toddler snacks because no one likes a hangry toddler who just needs a little protein fix!
We will also be focusing on our budget to make sure we can meal prep as much as possible without breaking the bank. This will include making some additional loaves of sourdough bread and sourdough bagels– yum!
I will begin pumping one to two times a day over the next month to increase my freezer breastmilk stash. I like to ensure daycare has a few extra bags on hand and that we have enough milk for a full week of work, should something happen to any of the milk I pump while not by our little on.
Last time I went back to work we had a few incidents of spilled milk (both while I was at work and the bottles we had prepared at home.
To prepare the garden, we are focusing on maintaining and killing some pesky weeds which grew this year. An early spring made it feel like we were both ahead and behind our garden planning at the same time.
Because we have very sandy soil, weeds grow quickly and tilling does not help provide added structure to our soil. To counteract this, we have placed tarps on part of our garden. We plan to remove the tarps, take out the weeds and plant. We will tarp another section of the garden and continue this cycle for the remainder of the season.
Last, but certainly not least, I will be focusing on getting as many snuggles as possible from both our children. This is my favorite part of the ‘checklist’!
Transitioning from 1 to 2
If I can speak for Spencer, I think we both agree transitioning from 0 to 1 brought different challenges (and possibly more) than 1 to 2. Thankfully we had a few tools in our tool kit to help navigate through this time period.
What worked:
- Sleepovers with grandma and grandpa.
- Our generous parents had our oldest daughter over at least one time a month for sleepovers. While we love our daughter dearly this time allowed our family to decompress, get an extra nap in, tidy up the house a little more and get a bit more blog work done. It’s funny how much we said ‘we miss her’ moments after she left.
- Having an expectation of what the postpartum period would look like.
- We knew a bit of what to expect from the stance of a newborn. A little less sleep, a little more grogginess and a lot more time at home. We also knew I would need time to recover (and faster if possible).
- Preparing meals for postpartum.
- I can not stress this enough! We made close to 30 meals between breakfast, lunch and dinner for postpartum. Let me tell ya, those oatmeal scotcheroo cookies – they hit the spot!
- Having a few new ‘toys’ for our toddler. This was essential during breastfeeding moments where we needed an activity to do (that was not the TV).
- Here are a few of our most used toys recently:
What was challenging:
- Figuring out how to get out of the house in a realistic amount of time.
- Getting enough sleep the first few weeks
- Mom guilt – on all ends. I felt like I wasn’t giving my husband, dog, or daughters enough attention no matter what I did.
Overall, I would say this fourth trimester has been a wonderful time. It has been challenging, humbling, and rewarding. I am so grateful for our life as a family of four and can not wait to see what this next year brings us!
What was your favorite part of the fourth trimester? What was your least favorite part of the fourth trimester? Let us know in the comments below!